Postcards from another world, part 3

This is what Jan, my therapist, had to say back in 2006. A great personal reminder.

Postcards from another world, part 2

Here’s what I had to say in March. Though it isn’t too far away time wise, it’s from a totally different state of mind. But then again, it doesn’t feel too distant right now…

Postcards from another world, part 1

This is what I had to say May 15 2006.

All families are psychotic (but mine take the cake)

I’ve been fighting with myself for years, trying not to be ashamed of who I am and how I feel. Yet it only takes a weekend with relatives to set me back and have me wonder if suicide might be the only solution after all.

Working my way to the top

What’s the definition of work?

My so-called father

What makes a person bring a child to this world just to abandon it and miss out on its life?

(But it’s all just) imagined

Everything turns to platitudes and poor clichés as I put it in words. Eller som man säger i Sverige: orka.

Scar tissue – the cutting issue

Self-injury is a behavior rather than a disease, but it behaves like a disease nonetheless. Cutting, carving, hurting and harming is the only way I know; I don’t know how else to deal with the troubles of life. I’m sure there are other ways but I haven’t found those yet.

The friend who wasn’t there

Whatever I do, I’m just never enough. I’m just so incredibly wrong. I’m too young, too naive, too troubled, too honest, too quiet, too far away and too close. Too much, too little, too late.

Life is not a movie

I have no appetite. When I do eat, everything tastes like metal. My mouth, my tongue, my teeth and lips are constantly dry. I’m restless but I’m too tired to do anything about it, other than obsessively run around in my apartment. I’m tired ’cause I can’t sleep properly. It’s difficult to stand up for [...]